Party

September 19, 2013

She counted out her change, clutched in one fist, to purchase a pack of cigarettes. “Marlboro box, please,” as she spilled the correct amount onto the silent belt. “You have to rob a bank to smoke these days,” I exclaimed. “I am not going to quit because they think they are forcing me to stop,” she declared. Then, she turned towards me, a startling pretty face, curly locks plastered to either side, and, with a grin, reached out and attempted to drop the remaining coins into my palm. “Oh, no, please, you need to keep that for the next pack.” She assured me she detests change, her kids will steal it from her anyway, so I should take it. I politely refused so she shrugged and slid them, like a waterfall, into the clerk’s stained gaping smock pocket. “I have had THE worst day, my faucet won’t stop leaking, the stove isn’t working right and I was stung by a bee today. I am glad to have the money.” “At least you have a job,” I comment, “I’ve been looking for a very long time” (though it has not been in the grocery industry, and especially not at the local corner market, I readily admit.) She mashed her thick lips together and waved me on, recognizing I was not going to grant her the Pithy Pity Party she was counting on. 

The number of job openings may be declared “up” but the rate of pay and exorbitant list of qualifications turns me away from most postings. I continue to send out three to five professional resumes and customized cover letters per day, with no response. It is frustrating and disheartening. With two very part-time, most likely temporary jobs, one that has inconsistent hours and promises late cancelation calls, I am floundering. My time is spent in contribution, searching employment agency postings, responding to emails that announce new employment in my area, researching new types of positions, and battling depression. It is not easy to stay alert to the onset of crabbiness. Symptoms slide by me when I snarl at the bank teller or sales representative. as I phone-in to pay a bill I do not have the ready cash on-hand to cover. It is tough. Don’t let ready Jack Nicholson smile and easy manner, from those who are out there looking for work, fool you. A ball buster time, (if I had any.)