The Great Trash Capor

September 3, 2013

The neighbor lady phoned into the police station to report a woman tossing loose garbage into her private trash can. She wanted to “shout out” to the neighborhood encouraging them to place their cans inside the fences, to prevent the onslaught of people, unwilling or unable to have their personal company cans to fill. She claims to not be able to determine just what kind of perilous rubbish is being housed in her receptacle. Who does that? I predict a future when we will no longer have a place to throw “away” to and then what-hoarding our smelly compost in the back yards, building sheds on top of the piles, to prevent them from taking control? Maybe having to figure out a way to eat our refuse, in order to diminish the mountain.

I have bigger things to worry about in my household. Have to take a sponge bath since I do not have tepid, let alone hot water from the showerhead, bathroom sink nor the kitchen. Do not have the courage to wet my back or stomach with ice cold water. The falls in Hawaii are warmer than this. I get concerned thinking about those frigid winter mornings when my nostril hair will freeze in contempt. Sent a pleading note with my rent this month, to fix the heater, pipes or feed the starving elves in the basement who keep the coal stove lit.

The woman who used to torture me through the ceiling shows up looking for her son today. Apparently he takes the school bus to our corner stop and she will collect him. He is nowhere to be found. Changing the route is probably under swapping the postal address on her To Do List. It sounds as though she has a lot on her mind these days so I simply give her the go ahead to have her nine year old come here and wait, if need be. No sense having him in a panic on the street corner after the bus drops him off. He can hang out with me, the dog and cat, have a cookie and glass of rice milk while we wait.