Emotional Upheaval

January 4, 2012

Dying food whisked out of the frig to revive into ham, tomato and ricotta cheese as well as spinach and feta quiches, broccoli and garlic risotto, kale soup and fresh peach, pineapple and mango fruit juice. Piles of steamy towels, sandy shorts, molding t-shirts which happens relatively quickly in this humid environment end up in several loads of wash. We all tend to argue about where the soiled beach and pool towels should be placed versus the clean or used and now drying ones on the thick wire lines. Ah, battles of the beach community! Smelling them does not always determine use.

After much digging around on the internet and searching thru business cards, Gi finally discovered an ophthalmologist who could check out her droopy eye today. They just returned to report it is most likely an emotional issue since the physician could not  allocate the symptoms to something specific and charged a mere R$200. The past few days she appears lopsided and sinister with one semi-closed and puffy punk left eye.

Since the postal worker will not accept the outgoing mail, I have to wait to send my letters in Lagoa or downtown. I am not sure if they deem the Chippendales dude untrustworthy or if no one actually mails anything out. Denise told me the government no longer makes stamps, they simply run the mail thru a machine. I beg to differ, showing off the colorful international and domestic stamps I bought in Registro and Sao Paulo. So, worldwide, letters are unfortunately, fast becoming an antiquated ritual.

There is doubt whether it is a best option for grandma to go to Canada in eleven days. Decisions like this one are infinitely complex and poignant. The elderly seemingly have little say in their final days, months, years on earth whether they actually have the ability to express words or not. Though everyone involved strives to be fair and just, the senior isn’t able to make the choice even when they have all of the details and facts laid out before them. Confusion and chaos, consequential alternatives and doors closing or opening depending upon which side of the fence you happen to be standing. I explain about our culture and how customarily the grandparents sadly either live on their own until they are unable to manage independently or are shuffled from one home to the next and quite often not residing with a family member. Adult children are busy with their own family and the majority have full-time jobs and children of their own to accommodate. It is not an easy decision especially when the family members are physically terribly far apart or do not see eye to eye on these matters. Dono holds my hand and whispers in her sluggish words not wanting to offend either of her children nor sadden the grandson who is old enough to be aware of the controversy. She is torn about moving so far away from her daughter, family and culture. Whether Dono leaves the area or not, her life is clearly changing since the routine here must shift if she remains.

Off to the beach again since I decided on a new resolution is to go to the water daily whether I dip in or not!