Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Unfortunate Job Carnival



July 23, 2013

The Job Fair wasn’t well-marked. The address was deliberately incorrect to check our adaptation and orienteering skills, though I followed my nose to the butter cookies, glazed with brilliant good-for-me pink frosting with multi-colored sprinkles spilling off the sides. Gotta love all of the complimentary pens, band aids, expensive unrelated-to-landing-a-worthwhile-job brochures, chance to win a free cup of Perkins coffee for the remainder of my days, and an occasional pocket flashlight. The event survey table was clean, vacant of anything but a half a dozen chairs awaiting hopeful rears, sporting a dark business suit, shiny shoes and a plastered smile running across the desperate mug.

They call it a Fair yet it resembles a Carnival, quick gut-wrenching rides that instill fear you don’t dare project or you will be forced to do it again and again. The City of St Paul had two loaded catering tables, Ramsey County was present, Health Partners and UCare, Avon, a coupla Not-For-Proft tables, a young gentleman who claimed the organization offered a starting salary of $8.35 per hour but parking at the airport runs $37 per month, although you are reimbursed $25 if you have a good attendance record within the first month of Union employment. Oh boy. When I claimed I could hardly live off of the generous salary, he thanked me for being honest. Another enthusiastic participant suggested their employees receive an exemplary $32,000 a year, plus bonuses. Great.

The only promising conversation was with Julie, a woman who encouraged me to go to their website and apply for the Recruiter post. She is the Business Development Representative and was most likely the closest to my age than anyone else within 50 miles.

I could also attempt the Accommodations Scheduling Coordinator position listed on Pearson’s site but they may arrest me for impersonating someone who is qualified to do the job.

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