Pool party

November 29, 2012

In the company of people I have never met before propped in a vulnerable and silly place with a pair of crutches and big fat toes, nasty scab and unappetizing purplish dented diminishing scar I find the place inside of me that can simply be, present, available, wet my pants heartily snort laugh..at myself. The incredible salty fish red pepper thin crust pizza pie matched with French red blousy wines increase the susceptibility of reaction ‘cause defenses come down. It is wondrous to reveal the joy of being one when typically the strife draws guns from the waist and doors slam closed behind hard feelings. Underscore of misunderstood burdens of the past do not prevent the brothers from deep smiles and shared thin clove covered cigars that stretch the conversation to Cubans and the expense of them.

A morning in the sunshine, sloughing off the particles trapped on the bottom outer edge of the pool tile below coolish water as the plump foot drags along. Therapy that will one day turn the corner to walking without appliances and unnecessary looks of empathy.  

Phone rings, inner complex telephone system buzzes or the doorbell chimes and I haltingly rise to the occasion to communicate with the voice affixed to the individual with the message. Usually comprehension isn’t an issue. More often than not when the information becomes complex, the instigator most likely imagines I am “slow” or drunk. Sometimes they cut the exchange short and leave it at that. The snort laugh returns overruling a previous version of reactive upset. Times are a ’changin’!

Concrete plans for the holidays continue to elude me yet I am hopeful and reaching. Skyped with my favorite elf, Taelor today and hollered over her shoulder to the boy on the bunk who responded in kind. What a treat!

Howard Zinn told an interviewer: “You have to do things, do things, do things; you have to light that match, light that match, light that match, not knowing how many times it’s going to sputter and go out before it’s going to take hold.”